Now Accepting Applications…

This post is a follow-up to my blog post from yesterday, so if you haven’t already… please read it now. I’ve received great response on #10 from that list and thought it would be funny to give the idea it’s own post.

The following is what I think it would sound like it looking for a mate was like looking for a job:

Help Wanted: Looking to fill the position of “Wife” for a local small business.  This position has many other titles which include, but are not limited to: Assistant Head of Household, Mother of my Children, Cook,  Bookkeeper and Housekeeper.  Applicants will be expected to attend a number of informal interview sessions aimed at determining if there is mutual interest in moving forward to the next stage in the hiring process: Internship.

Once the applicant becomes an intern, she gains some but not all of the privileges and responsibilities of the permanent position.  The applicant will be subjected to intense questioning by friends and family, and should be prepared to answer difficult questions.  The purpose of the internship is to determine if the applicant is truly compatible and a perfect match for the company.  Both the applicant and the company have the right to terminate the internship at any time.

During the internship, the applicant is prohibited from participating in an internship with another company.  Doing so is grounds for immediate removal from the program.

If after an appropriate amount of time the applicant and the company have determined that they are a match, the company will extend an offer to the applicant to join the company on a permanent basis.  If she accepts this offer, preparations will begin for the official hiring ceremony.

After joining the company, the former applicant will automatically become a full and equal partner in the company.  This is a lifetime position, and the partner is expected to share in the load to maintain the stability and success of the new company.  As the company grows and opens new branches, it will be necessary for both partners to be deeply envolved with the new branches to ensure their success.

If you are intrigued by challenges and rewards of this position,  I encourage you to apply at your earliest convenience.   Applications are accepted in person and at any time, unless another applicant has already begun the interview process.

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